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Another part of the island.
Tell not me; when the butt is out, we will drink
water; not a drop before: therefore bear up, and
board 'em. Servant-monster, drink to me.
Servant-monster! the folly of this island! They
say there's but five upon this isle: we are three
of them; if th' other two be brained like us, the
state totters.
Drink, servant-monster, when I bid thee: thy eyes
are almost set in thy head.
Where should they be set else? he were a brave
monster indeed, if they were set in his tail.
My man-monster hath drown'd his tongue in sack:
for my part, the sea cannot drown me; I swam, ere I
could recover the shore, five and thirty leagues off
and on. By this light, thou shalt be my lieutenant,
monster, or my standard.
Your lieutenant, if you list; he's no standard.
We'll not run, Monsieur Monster.
Nor go neither; but you'll lie like dogs and yet say
nothing neither.
Moon-calf, speak once in thy life, if thou beest a
good moon-calf.
How does thy honour? Let me lick thy shoe.
I'll not serve him; he's not valiant.
Thou liest, most ignorant monster: I am in case to
justle a constable. Why, thou deboshed fish thou,
was there ever man a coward that hath drunk so much
sack as I to-day? Wilt thou tell a monstrous lie,
being but half a fish and half a monster?
Lo, how he mocks me! wilt thou let him, my lord?
'Lord' quoth he! That a monster should be such a natural!
Lo, lo, again! bite him to death, I prithee.
Trinculo, keep a good tongue in your head: if you
prove a mutineer,--the next tree! The poor monster's
my subject and he shall not suffer indignity.
I thank my noble lord. Wilt thou be pleased to
hearken once again to the suit I made to thee?
Marry, will I kneel and repeat it; I will stand,
and so shall Trinculo.
Enter ARIEL, invisible
As I told thee before, I am subject to a tyrant, a
sorcerer, that by his cunning hath cheated me of the island.
Thou liest.
Thou liest, thou jesting monkey, thou: I would my
valiant master would destroy thee! I do not lie.
Trinculo, if you trouble him any more in's tale, by
this hand, I will supplant some of your teeth.
Why, I said nothing.
Mum, then, and no more. Proceed.
I say, by sorcery he got this isle;
From me he got it. if thy greatness will
Revenge it on him,--for I know thou darest,
But this thing dare not,--
That's most certain.
Thou shalt be lord of it and I'll serve thee.
How now shall this be compassed?
Canst thou bring me to the party?
Yea, yea, my lord: I'll yield him thee asleep,
Where thou mayst knock a nail into his bead.
Thou liest; thou canst not.
What a pied ninny's this! Thou scurvy patch!
I do beseech thy greatness, give him blows
And take his bottle from him: when that's gone
He shall drink nought but brine; for I'll not show him
Where the quick freshes are.
Trinculo, run into no further danger:
interrupt the monster one word further, and,
by this hand, I'll turn my mercy out o' doors
and make a stock-fish of thee.
Why, what did I? I did nothing. I'll go farther
Didst thou not say he lied?
Thou liest.
Do I so? take thou that.
As you like this, give me the lie another time.
I did not give the lie. Out o' your
wits and bearing too? A pox o' your bottle!
this can sack and drinking do. A murrain on
your monster, and the devil take your fingers!
Ha, ha, ha!
Now, forward with your tale. Prithee, stand farther
Beat him enough: after a little time
I'll beat him too.
Stand farther. Come, proceed.
Why, as I told thee, 'tis a custom with him,
I' th' afternoon to sleep: there thou mayst brain him,
Having first seized his books, or with a log
Batter his skull, or paunch him with a stake,
Or cut his wezand with thy knife. Remember
First to possess his books; for without them
He's but a sot, as I am, nor hath not
One spirit to command: they all do hate him
As rootedly as I. Burn but his books.
He has brave utensils,--for so he calls them--
Which when he has a house, he'll deck withal
And that most deeply to consider is
The beauty of his daughter; he himself
Calls her a nonpareil: I never saw a woman,
But only Sycorax my dam and she;
But she as far surpasseth Sycorax
As great'st does least.
Is it so brave a lass?
Ay, lord; she will become thy bed, I warrant.
And bring thee forth brave brood.
Monster, I will kill this man: his daughter and I
will be king and queen--save our graces!--and
Trinculo and thyself shall be viceroys. Dost thou
like the plot, Trinculo?
Give me thy hand: I am sorry I beat thee; but,
while thou livest, keep a good tongue in thy head.
Within this half hour will he be asleep:
Wilt thou destroy him then?
Ay, on mine honour.
This will I tell my master.
Thou makest me merry; I am full of pleasure:
Let us be jocund: will you troll the catch
You taught me but while-ere?
At thy request, monster, I will do reason, any
reason. Come on, Trinculo, let us sing.
Flout 'em and scout 'em
And scout 'em and flout 'em
Thought is free.
That's not the tune.
Ariel plays the tune on a tabour and pipe
What is this same?
This is the tune of our catch, played by the picture
of Nobody.
If thou beest a man, show thyself in thy likeness:
if thou beest a devil, take't as thou list.
O, forgive me my sins!
He that dies pays all debts: I defy thee. Mercy upon us!
Art thou afeard?
No, monster, not I.
Be not afeard; the isle is full of noises,
Sounds and sweet airs, that give delight and hurt not.
Sometimes a thousand twangling instruments
Will hum about mine ears, and sometime voices
That, if I then had waked after long sleep,
Will make me sleep again: and then, in dreaming,
The clouds methought would open and show riches
Ready to drop upon me that, when I waked,
I cried to dream again.
This will prove a brave kingdom to me, where I shall
have my music for nothing.
When Prospero is destroyed.
That shall be by and by: I remember the story.
The sound is going away; let's follow it, and
after do our work.
Lead, monster; we'll follow. I would I could see
this tabourer; he lays it on.
Wilt come? I'll follow, Stephano.

Caliban continued to ignore Prospero's orders. He was in thrall of his new masters, and very drunk.


"Okay," Stephano slurred, "when we finish this barrel we'll drink water, but not a drop until the booze is done! Cheers and get it down you! Servant-monster, drink to me!"


"Servant-monster! Nature's folly!" Trinculo yelled. "They say this island has only five people. We are three of them. If the other two aren't any smarter than us then this island's in a bad way!"


"Drink, servant-monster, when I tell you to," Stephano said. "Your eyes stare out of your head."


"Is there anywhere else they should be?" Trinculo asked. "He'd be even more amazing if they were staring out of his tail!"


Caliban lay conscious but slumped in alcoholic bliss.


"My man-monster has drowned his tongue in booze," Stephano said. "The sea couldn't even drown me. I took me thirty-five leagues of hard swimming before I reached the shore. Man-monster, you can be my lieutenant or standard-bearer."


"Have to be your lieutenant, he's too drunk to be a standing bearer!" Trinculo said laughing at his own joke.


"We'll show him, Mr Man-monster!"


Stephano tried to pick Caliban up. But Caliban's weight and size overwhelmed him.


"The pair of you can't walk! You'll lie about like dogs, saying nothing," Trinculo laughed.


"Man-monster, if you are an obedient monster, speak for goodness sake," Stephano pleaded.


"How is my master? Can I lick your boots?" Caliban said. "And I won't serve him - he's not brave," Caliban added about Trinculo.


"You lying, ignorant monster! I've jostled with policemen! Why, you stupid fish you, was there ever a coward who drunk as much as I have today? How can you tell a monstrous lie when you're only half monster, other half fish?" Trinculo yelled.


"Listen to how he mocks me! Will you let him away with this, my lord?" Caliban pleaded to Stephano.


"Lord, says he! That monster is half-witted!" Trinculo retorted.


"Here he goes again! Bite him to death, I beg you, lord!" Caliban said.


"Trinculo, you keep a polite tongue in your head. If you prove to be a mutineer then there's plenty of hanging trees waiting for you. The poor monster is one of my subjects and he will not be subjected to indignities."


"I thank my noble lord. Would it please you to listen again to my humble petition?" Caliban pleaded.


"Permission granted. Kneel and tell me again. I will stand, and so will Trinculo."


Stephano clicked his fingers and gestured at Trinculo to stand to attention.  Ariel, on assignment from Prospero, glided invisibly around them.


"As I told you before," Caliban began, "I am subject to a tyrant, a sorcerer, who has cunningly cheated me of my island."


"Liar!" Ariel yelled.


"You're lying, you cheeky monkey, you!" Caliban screamed at Trinculo. "I wish my valiant master would destroy you. I don't lie!"


"Trinculo, if you trouble him telling his tale just once more and I will knock your teeth out," Stephano said sternly.


"Why? I didn't open my mouth!"


"Button it, then. No more! Caliban, proceed."


"As I was saying, it was by sorcery he got this island. He stole it from me. If Your Greatness will take revenge on him- for I know you have the daring unlike some-"


"That's for sure!" Stephano added as he smirked at Trinculo.


"You can be lord of this island, and I will serve you."


"How can we pull it off? Can you take me to the culprit?"


"Yes, yes, my lord. I'll do so when he is sleeping and you can bash his brains out."


"You're lying. You can't," Ariel said.


Caliban looked sternly at Trinculo: "What a tosh-talker you are! You cheeky fool!"


While Ariel grinned with delight at his own mischief, Caliban turned to his new master for help: "I beg Your Greatness, give him the hiding he deserves. And remove his supply of alcohol. When that's gone, he'll only have seawater to drink! I won't show him where the fresh springs are to be found."


Caliban glared smugly at Trinculo.


"Trinculo, watch your step," Stephano said grandly. "Interrupt the monster just once more and, I warn you, I'll show no mercy. You, too, will look like the monster!"


"Why? What did I do?" Trinculo asked, genuinely bewildered. "I did nothing. I'll stand far away."


"Didn't you say the man-monster lied?" Stephano asked Trinculo.


"You lie!" Ariel whispered slyly.


"Do I, indeed? Take that!" Stephano said as he whacked Trinculo with a plank of driftwood. "There's plenty more of that if you want to call me a liar again!"


"I didn't call you a lair! Your mind and your hearing were lost in the shipwreck. Keep your booze if this is what it does to you! Keep your monster, and may the devil take your fists!"


"Ha, ha, ha!" Caliban jeered.


"Now, man-monster, continue with your story. As for you, Trinculo, stand over there."


"Beat him well," Caliban said. "And then I'll have a go, too."


"You're still too close, Trinculo," Stephano said as he waived his partner away. "Man-monster, proceed."


"As I said, it's his habit to sleep in the afternoon. That's when you could smash his brains after seizing his books. Or you could smash his skull with a log or stab his with a stake, or even cut his throat with a knife. Remember you must get his books first. Without them he is just as mortal as you or I, without a single spirit at his command. They all hate him just as much as I do. His books must be burnt. He has fine utensils, as he calls them, which are for the house he thinks he will one day have. But most interesting is the beauty of his daughter. He himself says she is unsurpassed. I have never seen another woman except my mother Sycorax and his daughter surpasses my mother in beauty as the greatest outshines the least."


"Is she really so bonny?" Stephano asked.


"Yes, my lord, and the marital bed will suit her. You will have many children together."


"Monster, I will kill this man. His daughter and I will be King and Queen- God save us! - and Trinculo and you shall be viceroys. Do you like the plot, Trinculo?"




"Give me your hand," Stephano said to Trinculo. "I am sorry I beat you, but while you are alive please keep a civil tongue in your head."


"Within half an hour he will be asleep. Will you destroy him then?" Caliban asked Stephano.


"Yes, on my word."


"I must alert my master," Ariel thought.


"Ah, you make me merry. I'm full of pleasure," Caliban shouted. "Let's be lively! Will you sing the shanty you taught me earlier?"


"At your request I will do anything within reason. Come on, Trinculo, let's sing.

Ignore ‘em and deplore 'em,

And deplore 'em and ignore 'em:

Thought is free."


"That's not the tune!" Caliban said with disappointment.


The merry-making was short-lived. Suddenly Ariel invisibly played the tune on a drum and Trinculo and Stephano came to a halt.


"Where is the music coming from?" Stephano asked.


"It's the tune of our shanty played by nobody!" Trinculo whimpered.


"If you are man show yourself as a man. If you are a devil then take the shape you please!" Stephano yelled defiantly.


"Oh, forgive me my sins!" Trinculo begged, unconvinced by Stephano's bravado.


"He that dies pays all debts: I defy you. Mercy upon us!" Stephano bawled, maintaining his boldness.


"Are you afraid?" Caliban asked his new master.


"No, m-m-m-monster, n-n-n-not I."


"Don't be afraid. The island is full of noises, sounds and sweet airs that are delightful, not at all threatening. Sometimes a thousand twanging instruments will hum in my ears, and sometimes choirs will make me sleep even after a long sleep. During my dreams the skies open and show me such riches that when I wake up I want to get back to my dreams."


"This will prove to be a wonderful kingdom where I will have court music for nothing!" Stephano glowed.


"Yes but only when Prospero is destroyed," Caliban reminded Stephano.


"That shall be sooner rather than later. I remember your story."


"The music is going away," said Caliban, "let's follow it and do our work later."


"Lead the way, man-monster, we will follow. I wish I could see this drummer, he knows how to play. Trinculo, are you coming?"


"I'll follow, Stephano!"